Christians are straight up FREAKS
i barfeds in our rink
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize
