The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Randomize
