he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize