Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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