Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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