You don't have asthma, your pregnant
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize