I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize