And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize