dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize
