How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
