Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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