I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Randomize