meet me or not, i'm out of control
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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