there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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