Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
