just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize