She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
The chlamydia really affected his face.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
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