is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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