would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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