I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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