yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
