She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
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