Its about making memories worth repressing
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
