are you still at the devil's house?
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
