You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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