I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
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