What a fucking waste of an outfit
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Randomize
