I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I got inside last night via doggy door
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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