It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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