I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
we should paint friendship bongs
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