do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
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