Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
