its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
