Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize