does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
