You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I think people are normalizing furries
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
