you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize