: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I believe in your delicious
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Randomize
