i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
