Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
