I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Randomize
