Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I think my vagina is haunted
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
