Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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