I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize