yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Randomize
