you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
