i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
She announced her abortion via fbk
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
