she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
