I'm really into asian looking animals
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
