Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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