hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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