I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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